People often ask why they haven’t really seen pictures of Little C since that first batch taken (thanks to Lori VanBuren) shortly after she was born. The answer is multipart, so I figured I’d address it here rather than on Facebook.
1. I have, quite literally, made a job out of using social media (and teaching others to use it well). One of the most-common complaints is that people post an excessive number of photos of their children. Because my profile is used to brand-build and entertain/inform/engage readers, I’m ultra aware of what people like, and what they don’t.
Although, I will say I am one of the (few, maybe) who really loves seeing cute pictures of kids — and much prefer them to cat or food photos.
2. I have a (very) public life (and public Facebook profile) but, as Little C gets older she may decide she prefers privacy. If I’ve posted hundreds of photos of her online, I’ve already taken that option away. You can’t fully undo your Internet footprint.
3. Some moments are meant to be kept private. Sure, I have adorable photos of her splashing in the bath, or asleep in an odd place/position after a feeding, but those are intimate moments and there’s no real value in sharing them.
4. There’s an element of selfishness in posting. Let’s face it, when we share images of our kids — be it online, in person or via email — we are, to a degree, “showing off.” We’re proud of that cute, little specimen we produced and want to boast about him or her.
I’ve always been turned off by bragging, especially when parents do it about their children. Being internally proud doesn’t lessen the feeling.
5. Shortly after Little C was born, I received so many well-wishes. One of the most-touching letters was from a reader who has tried for many, many years to have a baby. She’s had several miscarriages, and has yet to carry a child to term. She talked about how she loved seeing the pictures and hearing the stories because she finds happiness in other peoples’ parenting joy.
Not everyone is that selfless. I’ve had friends — and talked with readers — who struggled to get pregnant. Seeing, and hearing about, babies was tough. Sometimes, it was intolerable.
While I understand someone in that position could hide me from their newsfeed or unfollow/unfriend me, I do think this is one of those instances where compassion — even if you had six healthy, easy pregnancies — is so incredibly important.
At some point I’ll certainly share more images. But, right now, vomiting pictures onto my profile — or on Twitter or Instagram — doesn’t seem necessary, or worthwhile.